Real And Inspiring Stories

Natalie*: My journey from alcohol dependence to recovery

“I lost my job after being caught drinking at work. I felt ashamed, terrified, and utterly broken.”
Change is possible, and there is plenty of support out there.

My name is Natalie*. I live in Newcastle, and I want to share my story with you—not just the devastation that dependence on alcohol can bring, but also the hope that recovery is truly possible.

Looking back, my early life seemed idyllic. I grew up with a big sister and a large, loving family. But when my dad left to start a new family when I was just four years old, it left a mark on me. From then on, I felt this need to prove my worth, constantly striving for success to feel “enough.”

I did really well at university and built a successful career. Life, on the surface, seemed good. I was the life and soul of every party, and I loved the confidence alcohol gave me. But as time went on, I started relying on alcohol more and more—not just for fun but as a crutch.

Over time, I started to become unreliable. I cancelled plans, claiming to be busy or unwell, but the truth was I was isolating myself, spending more time with what I thought of as my “best friend”—alcohol. My insecurities and need for validation affected my relationships, and deep down, I knew something was very wrong.

I first tried to address my drinking in 2003 by attending AA. But I wasn’t ready to let go of alcohol. I couldn’t imagine life without it then, and the idea of stopping felt impossible.

Over the years, things spiralled further. By 2018, I was in a truly dark place. I needed a drink just to function, and I eventually lost my job after being caught drinking at work. I felt ashamed, terrified, and utterly broken.

Thankfully, I had a supportive mum and stepdad who took me in. They’d been worried for years, and while having me home gave them some relief, I began to see the real impact my behaviour had taken on them.

My first step toward recovery was reaching out for help through my GP. I was referred to my local addiction recovery service and assigned a recovery worker. This led me to discover SMART Recovery, something I hadn’t heard of before.

SMART stands for Self-Management and Recovery Training. It’s a science-based program that teaches practical tools for managing addictive behaviours. I was really sceptical at first but willing to try anything.

In addition to attending AA, I started going to recovery meetings. Over time, I found the focus on empowerment and practical strategies really resonated with me. I also began volunteering with my local recovery service and eventually trained to become a SMART facilitator.

Today, my life looks and is completely different. I still pinch myself sometimes. I have a busy social life, packed with activities I never thought I’d enjoy without alcohol. I’ve also learned how to handle life’s challenges using SMART’s tools, which have helped me far beyond recovery.

Recovery isn’t easy, but life isn’t sometimes easy but it’s worth it.

If you’re struggling, know that there’s hope. Change is possible, and there is plenty of support out there.

 

* For privacy reasons, the name of the individual in this article has been changed.